God Is Good

I have so many things to be grateful about.I know that I have never been somewhat so religious here moreover writing something about blessings and God and religion.

I do respect every religious beliefs including atheism and agnotism and everything in between but personally I am a christian and here I am going to share some of my story about how I feel that God has blessed me abundantly until this very second.I am not a fanatic and I dont think that my belief is the only one that is true.I dont write this to persuade you being a christian or what I just want to share some of my thoughts here.An open minded person always open his/her heart to every opportunities to learn about different sides of the story so I hope that this writing will broaden your mind and increase your understanding about why and how some people can be so faithful and dedicated to their religion.

The introduction may leads you to think that this will be ‘a hard to comprehend’post.A post that contains a lot of quotes,biblical verses,experts’opinion,and ’10 reasons to believe that God exists’ arguments.Lol,chill peeps,chill.This isn’t anything like that,not even a single verse will be mention,I just want to list things to be grateful about this week(to be read again in gloomier days),promise!

So,this week has been so amazing.I am not trying to be ironic here.I know that this week is midterm week and I just got awfully disappointing result for listening.Lol the lecturer is so annoying.I lost almost 12 points just only because I typed 300.000 which is Indonesian writing format instead of the international format (300,000) and since the exam was computer based and the computer couldn’t read indonesian format so yeah bye bye points.

Currently I am enjoying a 3 days break before having basic acting mid term rehearsal this wednesday.Okay I am getting random now so back to topic some great things that just happened during this week are:

1)Last Saturday I went shopping things with Maggie.I was wavering between buying nail polish or korean face mask because both are in the same price.Since I am the most indecisive girl on earth I let Maggie decide for me and I ended up buying 97 Love Affair In Bel Air Nail Lacquer.The color is nude baby pink,soo pretty!!

What’s amazing is that on Sunday my aunt who resides in Singapore had just come and gave me a bag full of korean masks.They are creamy whitening masks and smell so good.I really dont know what to say I just happen to know that it is not just the universe being nice with me but it was one of God’s blessings in my life.I have experienced things like this for so many times in my life.Like when I was 6 years old and I craved cheese lasagna so badly.I didnt tell anyone but I prayed.Then out of sudden a package of hot pippin’ lasagna arrived in our door,sent by a friend of mum (she didnt even understand why).

2)Also on that Saturday I consider buying new earphones because mine has already been so worn out but I didn’t buy because I thought I have spent too much that day.
Yeah and you know what,the next day my mum bought me new pink earphones in a Japanese retail store.We didn’t visit it on purpose and I didn’t even utter a word about needing a new earphone and for your information mum never ever know or want to know about my earphones’s condition.In fact she always hate it when I dont listen to her because I am wearing earphone.So yeah can you imagine how surprised I was.

3)I just went swimming this morning and the weather was so nicee.The water was cool and the sun was shining but not too bright it was just perfect.I cannot swim and still learning by the way.Oh and now I feel so happy and healthy.

4)I feel so safe and happy and secure.I can snug in bed comfortably without worrying about International politics and war and my future or whatever hell I usually think about.

5)It rained for the first time in 3 months this evening and I am so happy because I really love rain!!!!

It is true that my whole life I ever question my belief and the existence of God.I have many reasons and stories to tell you about but may be next time.Now I have reached that point when I already have my faith back.My heart has been crushed and hurt and there was time when I couldn’t trust anyone but now I am in the beginning of a phase where I begin to forgive,to try to believe,and to love life again.

Please,just hope for the best things for me.I am tired being negative and depressed.

PS: 正在听着老鼠爱大米 ❤


Homo Sapiens

I am happy,happy,happy!
I am smiling from ear to ear!
Right now I am sprawled on my bed in the least attractive position possible.Eating sweet cereal right from its box.Life has pissed me off so many times since the last time I got into here.I am tired of being tired and angry of life and thanks God my hormonal fluctuation has been so nice to me these days.I mean yes I have mid-terms and yes I have crazy hectic schedule last week but my current state of mind is happy.Completely happy I cant even believe it.

I am not in love I just dont want you to get me wrong because of that video I attached up there.I just watched that video an hour ago and it makes me think about a lot of things.

About how human beings’ lives are actually so simple and meaningless.I mean look at us!We spend way too much energy to deal with our daily emotions without realizing that we are actually just blindly being driven by our complicated hormonal and nervous systems fluctuation.We are being played by our own body,by our own systems every single day.

In the end we are all just stardust
drifting alone
Looking for something to cling to
In this whole chaotic universe

I have been trying too hard to get everything in order,to be a person people expect me to be.The pressure is hard thankfully.Because then I started to question the truest meaning of freedom and equality of life.Start wondering about my own destiny,my own fate.

Homo sapiens.
that it is.
We are no more than just another species on this planet.Just another living thing.Another living thing with a free soul and a free mind.
We are wired with that special feature with a reason.We are destined to create our own fate instead of just following it.
Yet we are still fated to die,darling
that’s one thing I know for sure.

I am not going to talk more here I just hope that this writing provoke your thoughts to start questioning your existence and making you sure that you deserve a complete freedom to live your life with your own rules without being judge by any other homo sapiens.

because inside,and in the end,we are all the same.

Eat,Pray,and Love

And here is an amazingly accurate story about how we usually feel.

I have been accumulating links and youtube videos here since I don’t know when.Life .has been hectic and tiring as hell this month. Sometimes things went wrong you know,you may not be pleased of it but the only thing you can do is to accept it and be grateful.I want to stay optimistic but it is really hard sometimes.This week I have succeeded the three first days without breaking apart but on Thursday I gave up.Partly maybe because I didn’t get enough sleep the night before and yeah everyone who knows me well know that I can be a real grouch when I didn’t sleep well.I don’t need long hours of night sleep,I can function well without any traces of shitty mood by only sleeping for 4-5 hours as long as there weren’t any nightmares in between.

My biggest problems now is that my dreams scared me.Both,literal dreams and future hopes.I mean,I am scared that I would fail and being the worst thing I have always feared’-well educated,brilliantly promising,and fading out into an indifferent middle-age’Sylvia Plath.I know I am taking a radical life choice now and everybody is questioning my sanity but deep in the core of my heart I know I still have that courage to believe and fight for my dreams.For my own life and freedom although it is against the ordinary system and rules.

I have just read this book Eat,Pray,Love by Elizabeth Gilbert although I have watched the movie when I was in sophomore year.The book is so much more awesome than the movie of course just like the usual.Liz has put that fire back in my soul.She gives me courage and hope to fight for my own freedom in life regardless of how society may think about it.This book,indeed,has inspired billions strong,carefree,young women out there,who are all still fighting to believe that their rights to decide what to do with their own lives are absolutely legitimate.

So last but not least,I want to put my self-mantra nowadays here-To succeed in life you need 3 things:a wishbone,a backbone,and a funny bone! which in other words means To succeed in life you need 3 things: ambition,courage,and a sense of humour!That’s why I decided to cheer up and learn more about life and everything everything as I go along with it ❤

PS:if i really only have 12 years of true freedom in my life i definitely have to spend it wisely.i dont want to be stucked doing things i dont want to just because they expect me so.bye.i'm so done yeah.


Question Everything


Have you heard it before?The Flat Earth Hypothesis?Reaching this point in life where I find myself cannot believe anything anymore (not even myself),I guess this is actually the worst time to find this theory.I came across a video by Geotimes Indonesia a few days ago about an interview session with The Flat Earth Society Indonesia and since then I cant help but feeling curious about this.I have watched a lot of videos about this,including videos that defend The Round Earth Theory and to be completely honest that first video I attached above is quite satisfying for my ego, somehow (I cant deny this)-I still cant believe I might have been wrong so far.What is actually important for me is not whether the earth is actually round or flat but the realization that I might have been believing the wrong thing in my whole life without even ever questioned its credibility before this.This realization led me to another thought.I suddenly realized that everything I have ever believed in my life as truths are actually just what I was told to be the truths.The right things are what my teachers and my parents and the society told as the right things.

So what is truth anyway?It is the reality,the fact,something that is not made by any assumptions.But problem is how can we know what the reality is if we were not the one who witnessed it?If we,in fact,never have the chance to proof something by our own freaking eyes?(in this case,well,not all of us ever had the chance to go to space and see the shape of the earth).And,ugh,can you even trust your eyes anymore?Our eyes are made of hundreds of light receptors and what we see is actually what our brain interprets from those light receptors’ inputs.If something when wrong with your light receptors,you will see a complete different picture.If you have acute colorblind from when you were born and no one ever told you about that,you will spend your life believing that the world is just black and white.So if this is the case,is it wrong for someone to say that you were wrong?That the world is actually colorful and you are abnormal?

That analogy above,I think is suitable to be compared to our point of views too.Every single human being has different ways of thinking.I am not sure if this has something to do with the neural pathways but I am pretty sure that just because someone says the world is just black and white means he/she is wrong because he/she has a valid reason to believe it.Just because the majority can see different spectrums of light it doesnt mean they are the one who right.How if God actually created the first human beings as colorblinds and we are all just products of mutation over the time?Ha!what are you going to say now,normal sighted people?It is true the world is black and white if you see it from the colorlind’s perspective.So why do you think you can justify yourself to say that somebody’s way of thinking is wrong?If a group of people’s beliefs or ideologies are wrong?To say that some people who live with a different lifestyle are abnormal???Just because they are different from the majority is that mean they are wrong??

I am sorry I know that I have shifted so far far away from my first topic about science hehe but this is how my brain works.It jumps from scientific analysis to politics then to poetry and then international security and everything you can thing of,just name it.Ha.So,back to Flat Earth Theory,tbh I am still not convinced.I still think that the evidences for Round Earth Theory are just stronger.I mean my logic says that the arguments for Round Earth Theory are more acceptable,logically acceptable.But still in science its true that we have to be sceptical and open for any possibilities because this is how science grows right?I am not completely against it tho some of the arguments also make sense to me but I am not just convinced enough.Plus again at this point I also wonder if my mind has been crafted by the education I have endured this long so that I cant be convinced easily about anything against that so to be called “basic science” I have been told before?I dont know.Like I have said before,and this time maybe it already sounds like a broken record to you all-I Question Everything.

I want to go to bed now.Maybe back tomorrow with recent life updates!See ya! ❤

PS:the second vid says that NASA and ISS might have lied and covered the truth from us about science .I dont think this makes sense.I mean why should they lie about the shape of the earth?seriously whats the benefit for them???


The Do Something Law

This week has been pathetically hectic and yesterday was the craziest.I cant deny that I have been learning a lot of things these past few weeks.I have to solve my own freaking problems and it surprised me that I actually dont know some basic simple things in life.For example,last week I found myself struggling to open a canned food.I felt stupid because how come I have been living my life for a whole 18 years without knowing how to open a canned food!!
Well I actually have so many stories I can ramble about them for a whole 10 pages but I guess I am just not in the mood of repeating and recalling memories of a tiring week which has just past *thanks God.Some significant events that happened are :
1.I decided to join the university magazine as online reporter and I have done several interviews with one more to go this Monday
2.I learn how to be organised for the first time in my life.Not only managing my time but also my money because living by yourself acquires you to know how to spend your income wisely.Uni has me to buy books and expensive ditionaries ugh
3.A lecturer of mine gave us a welcome speech and I think I will never forget her words forever.She said things that all make sense to me and have been proofed to be so true and useful for me.She told us that being an adult means being responsible of things that we did,on purpose or not on purpose.Most of the time,problems occurs unpurposefully.We never mean to forget things ungracefully,we never mean to leave our keys at home or not doing an assignment we didnt even know was given.We never purposefully putting ourselves in mortifying situations but life sometimes does put us there.And what should we do if we have been in that situation?Do something.That’s the basic rule.Dont just wait for life to pass unless you will end up feeling bad for yourself.Even when you dont have any idea what to do or when you feel like your attemps are so pathetic and unhelpful,just do something about it to make yourself feel good.To make yourself know that at least you have tried.That at least you didnt just give up and wait for the universe to flow.The universe doesnt just revolve around you.It’s about everybody else but it is you who is responsible with your own life.You dont like your salary?You dont like your apartment?You dont like your family?You loathe your job and your friends?Well,thats your fault.You are the one who can change everything and no one else is in charge for it.
4.If I have actually learnt something besides graphing parabola from highschool ,it must be this : Don’t expect too high unless you will be dissappointed more.Dont aim to be the best in doing anything.Just aim to do everything better than you have before.In other words-be realistic and dont you ever compare yourself to others.
5.Learn to be alone because no one will stay forever.Uni lyfe is highly solitary.You do everything by yourself.You dont have classmates.They keep on changing in every subjects you enroll and since I am suck in remembering people this makes it even worse but because I have always been alone my whole life so there isnt any remarkable loneliness.
PS:Just visited Kat’s page before logging in here and I am so happy she is back into blogging againn!
PPS: A song she attached there on a page “Wasn’t Expecting That”is soo good I cant stop listening to it even now Im still listening to it while typing this.

Looking forward for another beautiful week.I hope I will survive everything and enjoying every moment possible in my academic school life period because I know this will not last forever and time flies so fast I want to cry.At this very moment I am trying very hard to gather myself to get up and doing something useful instead of lamenting the facts that I cant revisit my history and memories,repairing every damages and heartaches in every wrong turns I have faced before.

Uhm okay so before Im getting too melancholic and annoying I decided that I have to stop here today.See ya next time!Laf ya always!

resharing this from Kat’s blog cause it is sooo lovely to listen to seriously I cant stop ❤


The Geeky Girl Is Still A Geek

Tired means tired.When you feel tired you actually feel at all that is what tired really is. What a fool I have been this long,thinking that feeling tired means that you are overwhelmed by everything all you want to do is just shutting the world down,while actually it is the complete opposite.Being tired is when you cant feel anything anymore and your chest is empty you dont even remember how it feels,to have emotions.
So if from my last two entries you thought that your geeky girl has somehow magically changed into some shallow, bubbly ,pretty little girl,HA I assure you now that you were REALLY WRONG.What actually happened was just I was tired of everything,literary everything.I’m even tired of being myself.I’m tired for always being the unordinary,the different one,the quirky one,name it,label me I don’t care anymore.This is why I decide to give it a try.I try to not think too much,wear more make ups,visiting current hits spot in town with a bunch of chatty girls friends,and everything everything blah.Aaand….did I enjoy it?Being shallow??LMAO,NO.It was all fun games at first but after a few days it exhausted me,and after a few weeks I gave up.A leopard cant change its spot so I think all I have to do is just be me and let everything happen.For my korean beauty products obsessions,everything I wrote in my last entry is true but what I didnt tell you is that I am still that kind of person who read all of the chemical ingredients of my blush on and skin toner before buying and using it.I freaking googled it and now I have been a self claimed expert in this field.I read about the difference of AHA and BHA and why they are good for curing acne and smoothing your skin, I read about oleic acid and linoleic acid and now I understand really well that they are the reason why hampseed oil and jojoba oil are always being prescripted by my dermatologist.In short-I still cannot be one of those girls who buy cosmetics just based on the pretty packaging without thinking anything else,I just cant.
What I want to say here is that some people who always engaged themselves in academic related activities,such as reading,writting,debating,listening to academical lectures and even watching political news,are always being labelled as nerds or smarty pants or maybe even a genius.This is bias,this really is.People who read non fiction science or Shakespeare in their spare time,or those who listen to political debate on radios every evening, are not always smarty pants or geniuses.But one thing for sure is that they are people who want to be smarter and better,people who want to improve themselves,expanding their minds,and opening their eyes.They are people who think they are not good enough and that’s why they keep on learning,and that ‘s why I never stop learning.

I have been watching Michael Sandels videos since hols and to be completely honest I’m in love with them.Sandel is a really intelligent man with tons of thought provoking questions and I cant help but loving him.I highly recommend these series for those who have been tired of 50 Days of Summer and looking for something deeper and harder to comprehend.Oh and also,after finishing Grisham I actually gave myself a break by reading an easier and happier book-That Summer I Turned Pretty by Jenny Han so maybe the review will come in next post.I’m really sleepy now so see ya!
PS: currently reading Mansfield Park by Jane Austen and actually it is good I cant put it down
PPS: If I am learning something this week it must be self discipline and time management I have always been on time these days!Wish luck to maintain this improvement!I’m trying!!!


New Fav Korean Products <3

I dont know what is wrong with me.I am done with my personality quizzes addiction phase and now I am in korean products addiction phase.Everything started from when Maggie went to Malay last June and asked me if I want to buy some korean sheet masks so I think it is fair to think that she is actually responsible for my current obsession lol ( this is me trying to blame someone for my current excessive online shopping ).At that time actually I was not really thrilled with the idea of korean sheet masks because sheet masks will just be sheet masks,nothing special.But then it turned out that I was wrong.Korean sheet masks are awesomee.They are highly hydrating and soothing and smell so good.Aloe is my favorite for hydrating while roses smell so good and if you are looking for something for making your face brighter and radiant,you should go for shea butter and white rice.As for the brands I have been using everything from inisfree to nature republic to skinfood and like them all but so far nature republic still remains my fav.I use them once a week at night especially after aan awful,hectic day.They make my tired skin smoother,more elastic,and healthier.They also somehow help me to relax and sleep better.Yes,I have problems to fall asleep I dont know why.

Sheet masks were just a start because I also have been trying many other korean beauty products such as etude house vanilla matte bb cream,eyeshadows,lip tints,and skinfood 99% Aloe Vera gel which I really like.This is actually a multifunction soothing gel you can use it for your whole body but I mainly use it for my face as sleeping mask or make up base and for my lips for lip balm.This save me a lot of money because I dont have to buy moisturizer and lipbalm as separate products anymore.This gel makes my face smoother and reduces skin inflammation problems such as acne or kind of.I reaaly love this product,highly recommended!Plus I want to kiss the inventor.

Last but not least,I want to update my current life events here.Uni lyfe hasnt officially begin yet but have done my orientation week.I have to live in a boarding house this month because at the start of the semester my schedule is so hectic here with all of those clubs’recruitments and everything.Adulting is hard,thats the lesson from my very first week living alone here,but also luckily I am a person who quickly adapt with every situation so yeah basically I am fine and I survive,and I know I have to,just have to,survive whatever will come next.Wish me luck guys.

PS:I am typing this with 10 fingers rules yayy it turned out that I actually can do so many things I thought I never could if I have enough self discipline
PPS:guess who just did some more shopping today?Just bought la vie en rose liya’s pink and the color is shockingly bright but it is still okay laa
Just got home from Stephanie’s farewell before she started med school in Jakarta next september,food was good and it was nice to have a proper meet up with old familiar friends after spending the whole week trying to make new friends with people I never know before..
There will be church tomorrow and mum would kill me I didnt wake up on time so byeee see ya.


Botanika Resto Surabaya

I am back!!! Happy and full of positive vibes!!So I just had a mini reunion with my elementary school girls.We at first had been confused to decide where to go,but then just like another 5 millions other teenagers in this city,we decided to go to the most-brand new and “so called” coziest spot Cafe Resto so we can post photos with their location and account tagged and TADAAA we are somehow like magic,considered to be the cool kids!Ha!Okay peeps so here I present you,the current talk of the town,Botanika Resto!

When you are talking about a restaurant or a cafe,of course you will talk about the food first,like-“Did you try the famous dragon fruit fried rice?Is it that good?How was it taste?Is it sweet??How was that herb spices chicken wings?Does it worth the price?”Or maybe “How about the oxtail soup and sambal matah?Did you recommended it to us?”Hell,yeah,the best thing about being the first one tried out a new cafe or resto before anyone else had the chance is that people suddenly think that you are a food tasting expert or kind of and start pouring out questions and they will believe everything,literary everything you say!

When we got inside the resto,the cozy atmosphere has already hanging in the air.We got there at 1 PM and the sun rays were illuminating the whole area through the big glass windows.Funny thing about this Resto is that the architecture is better than the food lmao.The architecture was great.It has an ecofriendly and minimalis modern style combined with traditional material like woods,rotan,and oh there are so many green plants.The resto is spacious and bright and so clean just the way I like it.And that’s why this is a very good spot for taking photos.Tons of photos yes.

Okay so answering those questions above I’m telling you now that the food itself here,to be brutally honest,is not that good.Yes,I tried the dragon fruit fried rice and herb spices chicken wings but they were actually not that special.The dragon fruit fried rice was salty and not sweet nor sour like most people think.The chicken wings,in my opinion should have been labelled in the menu with tagline like this”Ordinary Indonesian Fried Chicken But Sorry We Are Out of Stock So There Are Only Wings Left”.Yeah,basically it tastes just like fried chicken but there were no drumsticks,just wings.I dont really recommend this dish.I didnt try the Oxtail Soup because the menu hadn’t ready yet.This is the negative side of being the early birds,most of the menus there weren’t available yet.I remembered ordering Rujak Aceh Kepiting Soka and after waiting for it for nearly an hour a waitress came over our table telling that menu wasnt ready yet.Please why didnt you tell us earlier?Ah,never mind,we also tried Kebuli fried rice with sunny side ups,Cabe Ijo fried rice,and ayam panggang something I cant recall the name now.From all of the dishes I think Cabe Ijo fried rice was the best.I like the taste it was somewhat spicy and salty and the whole combination was just so beautiful.Kebuli fried rice was fine but the flavor was too heavy for me,too much spices I want to cry.

For the drinks,we ordered Lychee tea,Es Loli Mangga (Mango Popsickle with soda),Es Campur,Es Chendol,aaand Naturasari.Yes,you heard it right,naturasari.It took so damn long for that drink to arrive.It was Rachel’s order and she nearly died eating chicken without drinks at all.Es Loli mangga was so unique.Basically it is just mango popsickle served in a glass full of classic soda.It is good but you have to drink it fast because when it melts your drink will end up looking like a pathetic orange flavored Redoxon.Yup,that’s what what happened to me.

After food and drinks,now the service.The waitresses and waiters are all so friendly.They greeted us when we came.Offer to help us hang our coat or jacket,folding our umbrellas,taking endless photos,etc.But the process of making the food took soooooo damn long.It took us forever to wait for our nasi goreng kebuli to finally arrived and like I have said Rachel didnt get her Naturasari until she almost finished eating.The time management is still so awful here.I hope that if somehow the manager stumbled into this review,he will try his best to fix it because honestly we were not happy customers that time,when we were waiting like crazy.If you are planning to visit this cafe in your lunchbreak,change your time quickly!And you have to thank me for saving you from another upcoming disaster.Visit this cafe at your free time,when you have nothing important to do that day.Oh and there wasn’t any parking fee but you have to use vallet service (YES IT IS FREE).So,if you go there by car,you have to get the vallet service even though you dont want it please dont ask me why because I also dunno why.

I dunno what more to say so lets just let the pics do the talking…

Service : ★★★☆☆
Architecture : ★★★★★
Food : ★★★☆☆
Time Management : ★★☆☆☆



Raya Kertajaya Indah Blok F No. 303, Kertajaya, Surabaya
Buka – Minggu (08:00 – 24:00) 031 5954800, 031 5954900


Sycamore Row-John Grisham (Review)

Title : Sycamore Row
Author : John Grisham
Publisher : Bantam Books
Genre : Legal Thriller
Cover Design : Maria Carella
First Published : 2013
Pages : 454 (author’s note included)
RATING : 4/5

A wealthy man in Ford County named Seth Hubbard committed suicide in 1989.2 days before he died he changed his prior will that was prepared by a big law firm in Tupelo in 1987.He wrote a new handwritten will and left 90% of his wealth to his black house keeper(Lettie Lang) and nothing for his children,ex wives,or grandchildren.He also mailed a letter to Jake Brigance asking him to defend that handwritten will to the bitter end at any costs because he know that his family will fight hard.The big question is why on earth would Seth leave nearly all of his fortune to his black maid?Had chemotherapy affected his ability to make him think clearly?What did Lettie do to worm out her way to his will?And what does it all have to do with a piece of land called as Sycamore Row?

This is my very first Grisham novel and now I am already deeply,madly in love with this one.Grisham is smart,funny,and seems to have this ability to craft complex and interesting characters.The idea of the story itself is so good I still can’t believe it.I have to admit that at the beginning of the book I felt a little bit bored because this book is slow paced as heck I can’t wait for the surprise elements to finally emerged.I usually love books that are fast paced and full of intelligent twists.This one had almost make me desperate and gave up on it but I continued on and I am really grateful I did.The characters are all awesome.All of them are new for me because I havent read A Time To Kill but now I promise myself to go read it as soon as possible.From all of the character I love Portia Lang the most because yeah if you are an avid reader of this blog and you also have read this book,you will easily see why she is my fav among the others.She is a beautiful,strong,independent young woman who is open minded and reasonable and I just cant help but loving her.Growing up in a difficult situation,running away after high school and joined the army for 6 years,has been visiting so many places in the world during her service period to the army and finally back to her hometown after doing some jobs in Europe to go study law.She is just awesome.The antagonist indeed,has also captured my heart.Wade Lanier played a dirty game during the lawsuit process but I admire his efforts in doing everything he could,in making surprises for his opponents in every turns.Some people born to be like him,they never mean to be the bad guys it just happens.In facts,in most movies I always love the antagonists the most idk why.Oh yeah and I dont really like judge Atlee.In my imagination he must be an old traditional conservationist white man whose mind and judgments are undoublty fair but also boring to death.I know he plays fair game but still I hate people like him in real life that’s why.Last,but not least I also love Harry Rex so much.This divorce lawyer has all the traits I love in a man.He is funny,smart as heck,easy going,good at negotiating,and sincere.He was not by any means pretentious.Oh and I also admire Seth Hubbard’s efforts,idea,belief,and his action by writing his last will to straighten the justice,to mend his family relationship to the Rinds family for what his father had done in the past.I admire and respect him so much because of this.

For those who had never read Grisham books before I think it is better for you to read his first book (A Time To Kill) first before reading this because actually Sycamore Row is a kind of sequel to it.For those who are always asking for what age this book is recommended for ,I have to be honest here that sometimes I dont get it why people even ask something like that.Everybody can enjoy a book regardless of their age because a 12 years old whose mind has already well developed could enjoy this book more than a 35 five years old whose mind is dull and never have the inner will to sharpen his own mind by reading books like this.So my conclusion is that this is a very very good book that must be read by everyone,I’m not exaggerating this but I definitely put this in my “50 books you have to read before you die”list.Highly recommended,especially if you are a big fan of thrillers like me.

PS: eventually there is still hole in this big masterpiece-why the heck Seth didn’t just explain clearly in his will the reason of his action?I know it may be bitter and bringing back unpleasant memory to him but please it can save so many people from this difficult and confusing situation created by his handwritten will.I just wonder why Seth why you put them all in this unnecessary confusing situation and bitter war?It is big money involved here,everybody wants to claim a piece of the pie why couldn’t you understand.
PPS:I finished this last night and didnt sleep until 2 AM just because I couldnt put it down,YES THIS BOOK IS THAT GOOD!

Plot : ★★★★☆
Characters: ★★★★☆
Writing : ★★★☆☆
Story : ★★★★☆
Pacing : ★★★☆☆
Cover : ★★☆☆☆




A Girl Under Construction


“The happiest people dont have the best of everything,they just make the best of everything.”-NN

I may have repeated this like a broken record before,that I may have obsessive compulsive disorder because I cant be normal when I love/hate something.And nowadays I have been obsessed to personality quiz.I dont know why but it really feels relieving to know that somebody out there understands you.Truth is 90% of what they usually say about me is so true like finding someone reading my mind out loud.On the other hand I that also makes me feel like “duh am I that predictable?”But nevermind,I will still read it tho lol.

I found out that some people from my real life actually read my entries because I never realize that my link is displayed on my instagram acc this whole time.So that’s it.Ive always been wondering how can they even know my url and now I feel so dumb.At first I feel paranoid.Knowing somebody from my real life reading something like this gives knots to my stomach because what would they think about me then?After seeing all of these??But then I realize if they actually really had read my entries here and somehow they are still sticking around me without judging me or making fun of me,then I should be grateful I have them in my life.They,after all,have proofed it that they will still support me and not judging me even after seeing my dark thoughts and weirdness.at first I also felt like my freedom is being violated because now since ive known that people i know read my entries i have to be more careful when I write,I cant anymore write furiously without thinking and ignoring every grammatical errors just because I dont care this blog is a ghost town so what.But now I realize that I also dont care.I can write what I want to write,that’s it.

Okay so holiday is almost over.Uni lyfe is about to begin by the end of Jul and I dont know why but I am not thrilled.When I graduated from Junior high,I honestly was expecting too much for high school.Because you know,high school is said to be “the most wonderful and exiting phase of academical study”.People start finding love,have their first kisses,first driving license,first being legal for alcohol drinking,and many more.What they dont tell me is that being in love involves being broken,is that being drunk could possibly makes a friend rambling out every secrets and truths you hope you will never know,is that the ‘exiting’part of high school is learning how to graph a parabola and reading a hemoglobin saturation graph.This is why,I learned my lesson,and dont set my expectation high this time.Uni will be uni.You will study your major and struggling with the workloads every night.I hope I will meet more good people,or at least I will be able to tolerate those whoever people I will meet.I am having enough of toxic relationships with human being and not interested in having some more for future deals.

I myself,consciously aware that I am (by any standards) not [yet] a good person.I am a sad person.I am a girl with bad habits and unstable emotion.I think too much.I am insensitive of other people’s feelings and I admit it that I’m lack in offering any emotional supports or even expressing my own emotion.I can feel highly emotional but I will never give you a single hint about it,I keep everything to myself.I dont share my thoughts and my emotion openly because I dont think people can understand.I cannot swim,cannot ride a bicycle (no kidding),and so many other things that I always want to learn but never have the chance.

I admit it that I am horribly limited and that I am still far far away from that “Miss Perfect” criteria.But cant you see that I am trying?Before logging in here I was practicing my neglected 10 fingers typing standards and every morning during hols I wake up at 6 am for driving lesson.I have boxing classes from time to time and do yoga every sunday evening.I do the dishes every night altho I dont really like it and I swear I am trying not to do it half-heartedly.And the most important thing is that I’m trying to be happy.I am trying to be positive because being miserable is tiring.I want to be a grateful person who can offer emotional supports to her friends,a girl who fast respond every chats and texts and emails instead of procrastinating them until something urgent happened.I try to improve my skills.This feels good but also mentally tiring me.For this moment I think I will still try my best doing this and keep everything on track but I dont know if I will break down or not.Let’s just see and hope for the best.

well said

PS:Currently reading Sycamore Row by John Grisham and it is so good so far,probably will write review soon ❤